Welcome, shoppers and fappers! We're happy to announce a big cock special in the produce aisle, discounted lube in our home items department, and the juiciest melons fresh from the field to get your mouth watering! Oh, it seems like there's a slight disturbance at the registers. Damon, could you please speak to your manager at the earliest possible convenience? Oh… Oh, what is she doing? In LINGERIE! Jeremy, get up there! Clean-up in the front! Somebody stop this wylin' woman!!